Suddenly, here we were, four years later. No longer children, but not fully adults. Well, maybe we are adults and we just refuse to tell ourselves that. It could be that we never become what we expect to be, and isn’t that just marvelous? I’m not who I expected to be four years ago, and I can’t imagine who I’ll be in five, let alone one.
In four years, we’ve completed degrees, maybe one, maybe two, and a master’s. We’ve worked jobs, met love interests, lost love interests, travelled, held dinner parties, watched movies, and yearned over a life not ours, yet still grew into the people that we needed to be. Everyone is starting to write the first page of a completely new story, separate from everyone else, for the first time.
When a friend group grows together, we all find something so magical—life in the smallest cracks: a garage full of memories, a dented car from moving, inside jokes made into stickers, walls covered in Polaroids, a peaceful lake day, hiking to standing stones, uno at a sit down restaurant, tequila shots no one wants, and peace on the remote-eating couch.
Each of us is pursuing something vastly different, screaming from the rooftops as we cheer on each. An actor who majored in business, a powerful woman going into law, a bearded otter bass that has no right being so talented, a comical entrepreneur, the kindest soul who’s a Colorado transplant finishing her degree, the sassiest mental health counselor, a sustainability major who will make a difference in the world, and the youngest and funniest stage manager at Oregon Shakespearean Festival. Having these people is so lit, and the fact that I would climb a mountain for all these people speaks volumes. Honestly, how have we not climbed a mountain together at this point? We’ve survived the Tequila Barrel of Peril and my father’s psychotic boating. So yeah, I don’t understand how or why we chose each other, but there ain’t a single thing I would change.
Over four years, I have realized that love is truly the most important feeling in life. The love you get when you’ve hit rock bottom, when you don’t want to do an assignment, or don’t get the job. It’s the love you feel watching TV with people who you didn’t know were going to give you so much confidence.
To the people who validate me as I am, instead of laughing at my self-deprecating jokes, I used to use as a protection mechanism—the people who broke down my walls and made me feel so comfortable in my skin. I have never felt so much love in my life, and sometimes I just need to remind myself that these people have definitely changed me for the better. (Oh god, I am in fact crying right now.) The people who have held me when I cried, held me up during my breakup, always pushed me to travel, and go where my heart yearns. I truly could not have finished these four years without you.
Alicia, Holden, Zack, Erika, Tristan, Frankie, and Audrey. My love for the seven of you is endless, and I look forward to meeting up periodically for the rest of our lives. To make more memories, moments, and to be reminded of how we survived… No, thrived during the most trifling, confusing time in our lives.
“There are good ships,
and there are wood ships,
The ships that sail the sea.
But the best ships, are friendships,
And may they always be.” – Jonathan Kurman
The Delusional World of Egan 
Leave a comment